Epilogue For The Week

A fucked up week

Glad that I am alive here

Practically I have both good and bad news

But the bad ones dominate over the bright ones

But who really cares?

-

Someone came to challenge my patience

Ended up with a burst of volcano

Making both sides to bleed

I knew this day will come

Although everything is over now

But I am not that narrow minded to block you

From any digital or cyber means

Like how you blocked me from your Facebook

You are just a coward

-

Someone keeps on airing tonnes of stories

Into my ears!

At first I was still okay

But I am getting irritated

Some more

I nearly die in a car bang two days ago

Your cursing and swearing failed epicly

That's why I am still here updating my blog

-

If the ranking on the D list is true

Then so yeah

I am the first for last semester

The only thing that could really cheer me a little up

-

I am getting busier with the ceremony

Practically I need to work with everyone to keep it moving

I am not directly involved in the performance

But I am indirectly involved in the overall programme flow

Don't be surprise when you heard my voice on the actual day

I am somehow been appointed for something different

Draft Six

Awesomeness

This is what I am looking for

Thanks JJ for the hard work!

Draft Four

Don't mock me if you don't like this design

My brain is running out of juice

But my partner is in his way producing another design

I hope we can produce something even better

Strength

Today when I checked in my facebook inbox. I saw your name became "Facebook User", I clicked in and nothing appear anymore. Now you disappear from Facebook already, but I believe you are still there stalking like how you used to, you know when you are reading my post. Yay, I mean now. I know you too well like how you do. It was quite a night yesterday. We chat for quite some while but ended up with zero results. I knew, it's expected. I would like to say it's quite late for you to reveal what happened two years ago. I've lost the feeling. The feelings to find out what happened, who is the culprit, when did it happen.

I said
"When a friend like me who totally has no temper towards you started to catch anger, you should be aware already".

I don't know why. Even I when I see both your eyes turned red. I knew I saw your tears. But somehow, I feel nothing. I don't what can I do and what can you offer.

My dad told me

"Even if you have the best adhesive in the universe, you can never make the broken line good again"

I Don't Understand WHY?

She says:

It's Complicated

People do make mistake. And I think I fell in this trap. I wanna leave, but I don't want to hurt anyone.

I say:

U r such an asshole...I hate you...

She says:

bu yao che yang. i duno why i'll type her name also.. di liu gan.

I say:

U go to hell la...hate u so much...kepo ttm...

... ...

She says:

i thought it could be a reason for me to find you. it ended up like that..

bastard.

I say:

Lolz...wad does tad supposed to mean?...if I am a bastard, then u r a bitch...haha

She says:

Don't pretend to laugh. You disgust me. And keep that to your love. I don't want to be the same standard as both of you. It may be my fault for viewing your poor security page, but your attitude really got me pissed off. I don't see why you get angry. Cause i don't fucking understand your passage. And i was just playing with your code. Whatever you're trying to satirize me i'll let you do so. Curse me to hell. Cause i think having you as my best friend in the past is more than being in hell. Tan yee. I'll grant your wish. I now volunteer to fuck off your life. Satisfied?

I say:

It has never come to my mind that you would reply in such a long passage and be in this manner. I will keep it and thanks for being true to me. I have always keep myself silent and always refuse to comment a word or two on you all these while. I know I shouldn't be as bitchy as how they usual act like cause they really don't like you. If you still remember that I texted you last few weeks regarding the info I wanna inquired for Exora. I was been teased for doing so. You even dare to throw me heavy words like you regret you met me. To be frank, you have put me in real despair which I have never thought of encounter with. Specious words confound virtue. Want of forbearance in small matters confounds great plans.

Things now changed. I have been uncertain on whether it's glad that we met.

She says:

what do you actually expect me to do then? you know that you're the only friend which i actually have faith in. even though we don't talk and seldom contact each other, you never know how proud am i when i talk about you to my friends and mum.

you may think you saying go to hell those words won't hurt me. in fact it does. i couldnt treat you the way like i used to. cause those who hurt me most are currently your best friends, closer than us last time. you thought i can face everything optimistically? after i saw what weilin said? i couldn't.

i'm sorry for what i said. i say that without thinking twice.

i don't mean anything to you anymore. every acquaintance of yours plays more important role than me in your life. even if problems among us settled, we couldnt go back to the past. cause its impossible for you to have good impression towards me anymore. even if you do, it would be hard for you to ignore your friends and be close with me back. since im a shame for you.

and i didnt know you'll get teased for asking info from me. i dont understand your last two sentences.

I say:

If you don't understand my last two sentence...it simply means that you need to improve your English...

-

Point Of View 1

In the world of cyber, the word "safe" never existed. Yes, I was been mocked that I have a poor encrypted post that you can simply broke into with your second try. What the fuck?! Please bear in mind that you can easily invade into my well-encrypted post is because I gave you the chance to let you know me too well. If you were to break in a bank, would you surrender yourself to the police aftermath? Only idiot does.

Point Of View 2

Do you really appreciate our friendship? Yes, I wrote "our", which simply means it is more than just 2 of us. Do you know how far had we been through along the way of our friendship? I always believe that friendship chain is invincible and lives immortally. What a joke when I was thinking that. Do you still remember the time before we have our SPM? How many revising sessions we had together? In your house, my house or the others' place. We shared the precious knowledge among, knowing that it is a treasure that everyone of us best kept. Overnight in a girl's house. It was my first time in my history. I sacrificed my sleep at home and slept over at your house just to revise Biology with you. I clearly remembered this because when I go back home, I received a well "lecture" from my dad because none of us ever over stay at one girl's house at such an age. "Change" although is just six letters, but when it really does, it causes devastating damage to everyone involved.

Point Of View 3

Since when our friendship line on this beautifully carved egg shell started to crack? Maybe until today you are still best keep with your own ignorance. But I have to reveal the truth. The first and also the last KL trip January 2010. Have you recalled how you hid at one corner and cried? Saying that you refused to go to "Sunway Lagoon" as we scheduled earlier. It's fine for you to cry at the corner for don't know what so ever fucking reason like "why you guys leave me and G*** alone when we were shopping just now?" Please, we have different stuff to shop and I assume you wouldn't be selfish enough to want us accompany you whole day long to shop what you wanted to buy, but not ours. Still remember how you teased us saying that we are a group of cheapskates after some crazily discounted stuff? You might forgot, but we don't. Reason being simple is because it left a really deep cut inside the heart of everyone of us.

-

In great despair and dismay

I hope everything could just ended here

Although those scenes are still sometimes flashing in mind

Vivid and reminding

But time could never be rewound

Deep in my sincere

I really hope friendship can still continue to march on

Although the ray of hope appears to be an iota

-

I can never erase you as part of my memory

You rooted deeply

You understand when you still see your face appear on the right column of this corner

距离

不是三言两语就说得过去

距离毕竟还是还是有差别

近至步行就可以接上

远至要搭上飞机

更可能需要调整时差

-

你说没有感觉了

麻痹了

你欺骗得了所有的人

但瞒不过我

我看你眼睛说话

不是听你嘴角在摩擦

-

无奈是难免的

十三年还是五年

都不是很短的一段时间

时间每一分每一秒流逝

人生每一步每一步在前进

即使你已在逆着走

我都看到了

-

我曾经想过放弃

挣扎的那一段日子

是不容易的煎熬

最后

我还是选择看开

-

人生苦短

何必强求

很多事情都不是在我们所能决定的范围里

模糊中

我看见你那略撩起的嘴角

已是我最大的安慰

-

宁静的日子

在过不久就结束了

原本想退隐的我

在强势所逼

需要披上战袍

虽然带着不愿意

但为了不让你弹枪匹马

为了大家的好

我可以做出必要的牺牲

只希望大家可以有更好的明天

-

每一次听《当冬夜渐暖》

都有想哭的冲动

Proposed 2nd Draft Only

Second draft

I am trying to develop a concept

Whereby a star is outlined by engineering tools which we usually use

Like ruler, pencil, scissors

to

Safety shoes, goggles, vernier caliper

and so on

And so yeah

-

As a whole DPE

"We Shine Together"

(This is the theme for Prize Giving Ceremony 2k11)

inside the star of engineering tools

Comment please

言语

认识了十三载的我们

即使距离只是九十分钟的航程

做梦时

我想你都会笑

-

我们之间

有可能吗？

Draft Only

A little sneak peek

To the very first draft of the booklet of

DPE Prize Giving Ceremony

It's Time

If you never phone me

I would have still living in my own world

Continue with my ignorant thought

Hiding away from the merciless truth

-

If you never tell

I would never know

Although I know he isn't that good

But I haven't know he is that bad!

-

There is always a warrior behind every field

Who sacrifices for the country silently

They risk their life to give the best of what he/she could render

To protect the people from Satan

To fight for our right

-

Fighting alone does not produce massive impact

From a different point of stand

I will start joining the line

You will never walk alone starting today

Disappointed

I am so disappointed to learn that

This culture actually started to cultivate here

I need a guillotine to lacerate the head of devil

Before He gains His power stronger!

Show encrypted text

Beginning

This is just the beginning

My cells are stimulated

Be charged and ready

For the worst case scenario ever

I am ready for challenge

Have you prepared yourself?

-

I made a mistake during secondary

Did a severely damaging decision to myself

I learnt my lesson

Today

I am making a right choice

Melbourne is all about you

I have not seen you in person for one year

I left one year ago

Exactly 365 days

You left two months later

And now hundred miles lie between

I miss you so much

Even though we are on skype recently

But virtual icy motion picture of you

Is never as good as in real lively person

I miss the fun in the black Camry

I miss your voice in karaoke room

I miss Cherry

I miss Sematan

I miss the food we had

I miss every piece of memory we share

You recent art project

Is the key thing that keeps me stay

Staying up alert

To keep my art cell active

Don't ever forget our dream to setup the company

You are everywhere

-

Hope to meet you very soon

In the very near future

Apology

This is the move I need to take

To break the bond

It has been quite some while

Fighting with my conscience

Trying to minimal the damage

It seems to work

Apparently?

Nobody knows except you

It's a starry night

It suppose to be a day for the world of two

But I take a hammer to break the wonder

Cruel you may call?

I just don't want to drag

And to cause more pain

It's the best I opt for you and for me

Let go with an open heart

Or

Hold it tight to feel the spike in heart

I am sorry

我回来了

16日的中午

再次回到书乡

一个我读书的地方

带着一丝的兴奋

些许的感动

参杂着期待

我回来了

-

当然

2011年4月16日

是砂劳越重要的日子

是我们的未来

更是马来西亚的将来

虽然拌不到国阵肮脏的政治的手段

砂劳越无法变天

但勇敢的华人

我们站起来了

这是古晋的一小步

却是砂劳越的一大步

加油吧

-

第一次做了一个错误的决定

是冲动的结果

依然在努力

把伤害降到最低

每天看到长发飘逸的背影

因为爱

可以很瞎

可以很单方面

可以很冷漠

可以很现实

我想突破传统

因为每一个她都是斗士

是坚强的豆蔻

酷而不失典雅

我寻求的

就是这样的元素

-

回忆里堆叠的爱

有时像风般刺骨的寒冷

有时像夏夜里蝉的共鸣

时而痛苦，时而温暖

因为时间所以把握

因为距离所以珍贵

余音绕梁

把距离拉近

我看到你的那一刻

热泪道出真心的我

-

我们之间

不是谁说了就算

拉扯的爱

徒增结局的难堪

多少次的失望

就是多少次的期盼

I want

I wasted so much of my time doing a diploma

Only now I realised

Time is precious

Only Civil Engineering will ensure my future here

Look at Ibraco and Idaman

The amount of cash they made

You will drool

=)

Elapsed

Two more years

And I will decide

To stay or to leave

暖了吗？

很多事情 不是谁说了就算

即使伤心 结果还是自己担

多少次失望表示着多少次期盼

多少次离开代表多少次相聚

十三个长夏

我们一起渡过七个

看着残忍的光阴渐渐把我们拉远

提醒了我她的存在

当月光模糊

满夜繁星

已是另一个低潮的开始

我看着距离

在黑暗中摸索着那一丝的希望

那根手指

是耻辱的象征

却是我们沟通的工具

当大海也不再那么蓝

当月色的纯白变得阴暗

当夏夜的树上不再有蝉

当回忆老去的痕迹斑斑

那只是因为悲伤从来都不会有答案

你的冬夜

暖了吗？

-

事实证明

幸福很难

Piece Of Thought

Officially one year off from hometown

Though at the time I writing this I am hiding inside my little study room in lovely Dusun

Where I was brought up since I was primary 5 or 6

I can't really remember

Every single piece of memory flashing through me

Is so uncertain and unclear until my late years in high school

When I believe it's the fastest time I evolve

From an ignorant little kid to a slightly more mature young adult

I miss all the journey that came along

It doesn't matter whether it's between you or me or him/her

As long as family and friends count

-

I was meeting Fabian on Friday and today (just moment ago)

I hardly express how much talk I have been missing with him

It is not easy to walk alone as a foreigner

Thus I tend to embrace the time more when I am in Kuching

-

Why do we leave?

To a city/country where better opportunity is offered

You will never understand how well being your own root is

Until you really set apart

To a place where it appears as a stranger to you

You try to mix around

Plant yourself deep enough to a foreign society

At times you think you are wise enough to adopt well

But replica can never be as good as the original

-

If you are given an option to live in

San Francisco and New York

Which will you go for?

A laid back and relaxing town

Or

A bustling and pressurized city?

-

If you say you are going overseas to seek for better living quality

Look at your own

You have landed property and cars here

Big house and big car

Relatives are around

You can have enjoy your childhood delicacies anytime

They are at your fingertips

So what?

Be contented

-

Home is where the heart is

-

p/s

I am catching up with Fabian and Weilin

But I miss Jimmy, Esther, Leon

It's Complicated

Show encrypted text

New Love

I got my first wife today

And ya

Dad is going off this weekend to Sibu

To do Qingming (tomb-sweeping)

And he will go to supervise the 60 hectares land

That granddad had left for us

Dad says maybe he will sell off the land

I asked him to hold back since we are not running short in cash

I think

On my next returning to Kuching

I will do a trip to Sibu to see the assets as well

Seems I am the eldest in my batch